The Uber Update

[Kids, I have bad news: to encourage my already morbid failure to update I can only use the library computer lad which closes, like now. So secret messages will be less frequent bu hopefully quality can make up for quantity.]

Thus, the uber update in brief:

Last week, Monica and I engaged in possibly the most absurd attempt to efficiently return home on foot ever. The walk from Ave Maria to our apartment is roughly one mile. Which is completely reasonable and within the capabilities of two fine young ladies like ourselves. We were each carting around paper bags crammed full of groceries people had shuffled off, I mean kindly offered to us. We decided to stop by College Inn to get dinner. The owner, who has to be one of the sweetest men in Ypsi, gave Monica and I two free Reese's pies. We had a nice little chat with his adorable nine year old daughter. Under the glow of such wonderful effects we thought the world was warm and sunny. Not so, not so. Unbeknownst to us, the Deluge had started outside. We asked the pizza boy who Monica was shamelessly flirting with (that's for kicking the plug out of the computer and shutting everything down. Ha! OK now I forgive you.) to get us a plastic bag for the pizza. So we embarked, or rather swam down the sidewalk to return home. My contacts were soon washed from my eyes. Monica kept losing her flipflops. Half-way there, Monica's bag ripped and we lost most of the groceries and...yes...her pie. For the rest of the walk I kept my eye on my pie yearning, hoping. Just as we were cresting the corner to our safehaven, my bag ripped open and I watched horror-stricken, as my pie tumbled to the ground with the rest of the food. I was determined at this point. *secret message* I made the choice. The pie would not be forsaken. I left everything else scattered across the sidewalk but the pie I saved. All that was left was a sadly torn, soaked paper bag, but I had my pie.

And that's when Monica and I realized we were trapped in a chick flick about two best friends out on their own for the first ever. Will they survive the mean streets of Ypsilanti, MI? (Who would have thought the drowning in the rain would be plot line?) Beyonce and Halle Berry are vying for Monica's role (Berry's reps insist she's not too old) while Linsdey Lohan will portray Meghan.

...to be contined (the library's closing).